Subtle inquisition

A lot has happened since March of last year. Yet to me it seems as though this journey started a few years before that. I do not understand how people can take certain scriptures from the Bible and hold them high, and yet deny so many others.

Jesus said the Pharisees main problem was that they didn’t love people. They upheld the law, and even went above and beyond to obey it. Yet their love for others was shriveled behind their facade of plastic righteousness.

Here in these last days it seems as though the New Covenant suffers from the same plague. Pharisees who see themselves as carrying great knowledge, and holding such wonderful truth, yet love fades behind walls of man-made traditions, unfair expectations, and five star legalism.

I hope and pray that they wake up and realize the truth of their actions and the error of their ways.


I finally believe that I have clear direction for my life’s purpose. I finally have an indication for why I’ve endured so much loss, suffering, and betrayal. The picture is coming into view and their is hope at the end of the tunnel.

I believe that God has positioned me, and is working through me to bring about an absolutely earth shattering change, and impactful event that will draw the church into a unity the world has never seen before.

I truly believe that if I will just get ahold of what God has shown me, and hang on to this adventure ride called life, that we will truly see the world change before our eyes.

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We want a Pentecost. We want a modern day Pentecost. We want a modern day Acts 2 Apostolic Pentecostal Pentecost. A revival is coming. A revival to shape the land. We will have a Pentecost Pentecostal Apostolic modern day revival and harvest…

When I hear these terms I can’t but help think this is proof of regression in parts of modern day ecclesia. We have so many preachers who beg God for revival, harvest, and soul winning. They are pleading for churches to “catch on fire”, they want communities to awaken to God, and rush to the Church house. They want to see pews filled to the overflow with new people, and they want it all to happen in a single supernatural hyper-spiritualized emotional event called revival.

I don’t get it. I know what they are saying but what will happen if they get what they want. With the exception of people waking up to God, it seems like this would be devastating.

Imagine a mass produced clone army seemingly forming overnight that begins to overrun the world.

Imagine the same attitudes that proliferate many of these church buildings. Imagine a massive collective of judgmental, pharisaical, holier-than-thou, trinitarian hating, denomination despising, united people demanding that the rest of the church world join with them or else.

Imagine a people standing to condemn dress styles, hair dos, music habits, tv habits, and even where people choose to go in their free time.

How can the world have revival with a people at the forefront looking down their noses at others, accusing one another, and fighting within, and without themselves?

The world doesn’t need another Pentecost. It has one.

The world doesn’t need another big church building, another conference, another sermon, or another movement. It doesn’t need to fall in line with the manual, with the organization, with the elders, or the pastors and Ministers.

The world needs one thing, and one thing only. The world needs Jesus.

The church needs to stop renovating itself while looking for another reviving, but instead turn its eyes truly to the savior.

Works based salvation isn’t biblical. Neither is works based relationship.

We need to stop saying we have the truth and let the truth have us. We need to quit pretending we are some spiritually advanced group, some elitist club, some special religiously superior entity, and humble ourselves before destruction comes to our doorstep.

We may be able to read the word, and discern the truth in many cases. However we, just like every denomination, or organization on the earth, must realize how desperately we need him, and how little we truly know.

You can’t lead the churches in our world in revival if you are unwilling to join hands with them.

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But it’s wrong…

Why is is there is such an adverse reaction to speaking negatively about a person in position, especially in the church. I understand that speaking lies, and telling gossip is wrong. I do not think that people should bad mouth, and slander people to make them look bad, but I do not understand why it is so difficult to simply state when a person has made a choice, or choices that are no biblical, or godly.

There seems to be a double standard with things. People say that we just bring two or three witnesses when an elder is being accused. But how do you get those witnesses together? If every time someone says that there is an issue, and that person is silenced, labeled a gossiper, called an accuser, or labeled the broad term “disgruntled”, yet they are speaking the truth there is no way for that truth to get out there.

If they won’t allow people to speak about it then they are not allowing it to be done the right way.

Secondly there is all the talk of not touching God’s anointed. People bring up Moses and Miriam and say that this is proof positive why you should never speak of the bad things a spiritual leader has done.

I say hogwash.

If its so important for them to protect the anointed then they wouldn’t be so ready to talk down others who are anointed.

Right is right and wrong is wrong. There is no in-between.

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Oops I did it


No, not the Brittany Spears fiasco. I’m speaking of the fall, the failing, the mess up. I speaking of the fact that no matter how hard I try, I still can’t seem to stop from falling, or failing, or perhaps faileding.

I fall. We all do, but I feel like the Apostle.

When I try to do good evil is present with me.

Yet still. Another mistake, and another…

I’m not my judge. Thankfully…

Yet this sinner seems to resurface over and again and again.

What good is repentance if I continue in faileding?

There must be a better way, an understanding, a realization, or a revelation.

Either I must needs be delivered, or that which I think is sin isn’t really that which I think it is…

Oh wretched man that I am…

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The Show Must Go On

Round and round it goes. Where it stops nobody knows. This carousel continues to spin yet I effectively offers little fulfillment of divine order, and purpose.

Jump, dance, and twirl after you lie, steal, cheat, and deceive.

Maybe things have changed. Maybe humility has won, and no longer does pride reign. Sadly this is more than likely not the case or certain restrictions would be lifted. The abomination would no longer need t be fed, and truest of unifying could indeed take place.

Still, the show must go on. We had so many people. We have gifting. Hurry and step right up to see the miraculous, the signs, and wonders. Admission is of no monetary value.

It is simply paid by your blind obedience, absolute submission, and complete loyalty to the cause.

I watch you and wonder what is the point of it all? Is this really a biblically accurate way of doing this so called “church” thing?

Are we really so focused on the lights, sound, presentation, and theme that we neglect the truest of all edicts.

I thought this was about loving God and loving people. I thought our identity was in Christ and not some superfluous uber religious term. I thought we were suppose to have the mind of Christ, be a servant to all, surrender privileges, and endeavor for the unity of the brethren.

I guess I was wrong. Yet the show must go on. We must have another speaker, another program, another fund raiser, and another performance. We must involve ourselves in ecclesiastical entertainment and call it genuine praise and worship.

Is that really what it all boils down to? Money, fame, and pleasure?

If I didn’t know better I would cash in my chips and check out of this game. I would walk away from the whole lot of it.

Yet Jesus. The same yesterday, today, and forever.

His nature is never corrupted by those who misuse his giftings for their own personal gratification and advancement.

Is this really what it was supposed to become?

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The Compulsive Liar

All liars have their place in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone…

You’d think this would be enough. This imagery of flesh melting and falling from the bone as the body falls surrounded by spiritual flames that bring you to the point of death but it’s sweet release escapes you.

This feeling of swimming is an infernal void of regret, self loathing, and hopelessness. This place in a pit with a reserved seating section for the Liar.

How is it that every day there is more to learn, or rather to unlearn about you?

I find that the entire time I was pushing, pursuing, seeking God, and hearing from his that great things were going to happen you were consistently hindering me, and compulsively lying about it.

You never truly cared about my growth, success, or progress in the kingdom. You intentionally planned for me to never achieve great things in God, and most likely chuckled under your foul breath every time you heard me speak hope to that suffocating situation.

I pray you repent. Do you see your church drying up?

I pray you make it right. Do you notice the drops in attendance?

I pray you ask other to forgive you? Is the note weighing on you more and more?

I pray you wake up. Don’t you see that time is running out for you?

Imagine what it could have been like with genuine Christianity and relationship with God.

Maybe the saddest part of all is that you have believed your own lies, fabricated your own reality, and refuse to believe you are standing in a wasteland.

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The sky is falling

Have you ever had a week that it looked like all of hades was going to break loose?

This was an interesting week but I believe God taught me some things.  

Basically I went to work on a fridge and it didn’t work. I had to go to the man’s house, Dr. Jekyl I’ll call him, and he had a few things to tell me. First he was polite, and then slowly as the serum, or alcohol or whatever took over he let me have it. Standing in his kitchen the man revealed to me his status. He owns four businesses including one for app development. He can fly wherever he wants to in the world, and has a high powered attorney. He has an investigation against our company and will soon begin to proceed with legal things if the fridge isn’t fixed. It’s been too many times that we have been out there. Now whether or not you believe he was serious he had a pretty convincing story. I listened to him cuss and accuse and speak ill of the company, and then say he likes me, I’m a nice guy but it’s the company and blah blah blah. 


I called my boss. 

At the time I didn’t feel like chicken little but I sure sounded like it. I told him everything and he told me we would go there the next day, put in the part, and fix it. 

I wanted him to help me describe the impending doom that i thought was real. He didn’t and called me a while later. We had a very long talk. 

I picked up the part in Dallas the next day, and eventually made it over to Mr. Hyde’s. 

We found the issue and my dreams of destruction were dashed. I didn’t want things to be destroyed but I was convinced. But God showed me something through this. 

It’s never as bad as it seems. 

God isn’t surprised, and it’s always better to take the low road, remain humble, and be still and know that he is God. 

The sky is not falling. 

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